Hey Soldier! Are You My Daddy?

“Are you my daddy?” is a question most men may not want to hear randomly.

On a brisk, autumn afternoon, I finished grabbing some food items at my local Giant Eagle supermarket in Columbus, OH and headed out to my “G-Jet” (government vehicle). As I put my groceries in the car, I felt a tug on my Army Combat Uniform (ACU) pant leg.

“Huh?!” I thought as I turned.

Looking down, confused, there was a little girl in a pink bubble coat and a stocking cap. She kind of had a slightly confused, but hopeful, look on her face.

Before I could look up and see if her parents were nearby, she dropped the bomb.

“Are you my daddy?”

Almost immediately, the child’s mother came rushing and apologized multiple times. As I looked at the mother, I could tell she was above and beyond embarrassed because she was avoiding eye contact. She wasn’t even looking at her child as she picked her up!

Military Families

The percent of married military personnel is comparable to the civilian population. In 2018, 51.5% of they Army, Air Force, Marines, and Navy were married.

It’s not much different than the civilian world from my personal observations, but the military does help the livelihood factor.

The government either gives you housing (on base, usually) or a Basic Housing Allowance (BAH) if you are not able to live on base. The BAH is raised if you have at least one child.

Health care for the family is also covered, so it being more difficult to afford a family is generally eliminated.

It all comes at a cost, though. Obviously, the military can cause more stress than a regular, civilian job, especially in the recent decades with the American Empire.

I personally would have thought the number of divorced military (4.7%) would be higher because of what I had seen from personal experience. However, I must remember I was in the Infantry and I was an Army Recruiter. These two job fields, I imagine, have more stressors on them than most army MOS’s (Military Occupational Specialty).

Are You My Daddy - a question very few random men want to hear.
A random child approached me one day and asked, “Are you my daddy?”

“Are You My Daddy” Asked to Me too Much?

All of these numbers are from the same document as above

The Marines have the lowest marriage rate at 41.2%, which is 9.3% below the Navy.

The Air Force has the highest marriage rate at 54.6%, but also has the highest divorce rate at 5.9%.

32.9% of the military are married with children, while 5.9% are single with children.

I’m not exactly sure as to why I find these notes interesting, but I have a couple conclusions.

A Marine’s true weapon is his mind. This makes them awfully proud of who they are, and I can see that being a turn on at first for women, but maybe something that doesn’t work out in the long run.

The Air Force, on the other hand, had some of the best looking women I’ve seen in the military (to be fair, I haven’t been exposed to a lot of Air Force personnel). This could lead to a lot of infidelity!

I also thought that there would be more divorces since I’ve witnessed so many young people get married very early on in their military careers and/or lives. Perhaps because I’ve heard plenty that divorce rates are commonly high, but the financial stability probably attributes to a better success rate in the Army.

Plus, many soldiers don’t stay in forever. Do the marriages and families hold up after they don’t have the full government support?

There are 1,088,584 males in the military. Divide that by the 136,964,979 total population minus those males in the USA and you get a .795% chance that I might be the father of the child that asked me.

That kid was really leaning on that .795% was in the Giant Eagle parking lot that day.

The Sadder Part

The sad part of the child asking, “Are you my daddy?” is that she wasn’t the only child that did so. On three different occasions while I was a recruiter in Columbus, Ohio I was asked by a child if I was his or her father. Columbus has no major military base affiliated with it – the nearest major base is Wright-Patterson Air Force Base.

The funniest one was when a little black boy asked if I was his dad. His mother was white! I’m half white and half Pacific Islander, and this kid was a few shades darker than me!

Although I have seen many successful marriages in the Military, I have seen it’s failures as well, and I feel deep hurt for these children having no clue who their fathers are. If the dad is a deadbeat dad, is it better that the child doesn’t know the dad?

I have never been asked this question when I wasn’t in my Army uniform. The only time I really ever wore my uniform out in public was the time I was an Army Recruiter. I actually had training that told me to do as little as possible to identify yourself as a member of the military. That made a lot of sense to me!

Remember that question the next time you’re asked, “Are you my daddy?”

But What about the Chicken Hawks?

Sure, this is a strange post.

There is one thing that is extremely annoying about Chicken Hawks though – the absolute blind support of the military.

Chicken Hawks, and everyone, for that matter, need to stop treating military personnel like they are absolute shining beacons of society.

Try telling a Chicken Hawk that there are a lot of terrible people in the military and they’ll brush you off like a buffoon.

Support the Hawk Bawk

If you found “Hey Soldier! Are You My Daddy? helpful, please consider further supporting The Hawk Bawk. The Hawk Bawk is an Amazon Associate and can earn small commissions if you purchase items through this link. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Thank you for your support in keeping the site running!

Further support at The Coop!

Follow on Twitter: @TheHawkBawk
Like on Facebook: @TheHawkBawk
Subscribe on YouTube: The Hawk Bawk
Paypal Donation: @BLoafX

Tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed.